Two Poems by Troels Steenholdt Heiredal

A color photograph in green tones, large trees in shadows on mountainsides surrounding a series of overgrown man made terraces in the center, lit up by the sun. Pisac Planters, 35mm color photo, 2024, Peru. By Troels Steenholdt Heiredal

For Nick Walker

Listen to Troels reading this poem¹:

I neuroqueer by the way I show up
                                                 in rooms
                                                 in conversations
                                                 in my mind

I neuroqueer when I lean in to my self
           trusting I have everything I need
                                   and finding beautiful
                                                               fruitful
                                                               expansive ways of letting it out

I neuroqueer when I stop thinking of how I should
                                                                                         act
                                                                                    speak
                                                                                    think
                                                                           and speak
                                                                           in 
                                                                           to 
                                                                           my 
                                                                           self
    expanding on the possibility of becoming

---

Slightly

Listen to Troels reading this poem:

    and I 
              kept saying I’m slightly dyslexic
              kept halving myself question
              when are you dyslexic enough
              to claim dyslexia for yourself
              who am I trying to please
              when not claiming it

   myself
              the idea that I will be seen as less than
              that I should be able to overcome this

   other dyslexic folx
              the idea that I can’t claim it out of disrespect
              for there are others that have greater support needs than me

              slightly dyslexic 
              slightly Autistic
              slightly me
              slightly sliding out of sight
                             of those benefiting from me
                             questioning myself

   neurotypicapitalism 
             the idea that everything needs to be measured for value
             that there is only one ideal way to be which we should all strive for

             my dyslexia doesn’t make anyone else more or less
             my dyslexia doesn’t make me more or less
             unless you believe in a system that says so

---

Troels Steenholdt Heiredal is an Autistic / neuroqueer artist and architect examining the differences between explaining and exploring disability. He grew up in Toftlund, Denmark, and currently lives and works in Taipei, Taiwan. His writing has appeared in PLAT 13, Star 82 Review, On:Site review, and Taipei Poetry Collective, and is forthcoming in Otherwise and arq: Architectural Research Quarterly. www.troelsheiredal.com | IG: t.heiredal

1. Thank you to Kr Moorhead, for giving me the prompt for this poem during the “Neuroqueer Your Creative Practice” workshop, led by KR Moorhead, Marta Rose, and Meg Max; which I can highly recommend.